The Story of Gabe the Giver

If charity was about doing good every charitable dollar would go to the cause with the highest probability of doing the most good to the neediest people.

If charity was about looking good charitable spending would look like it does now; spending on a buffet of causes, associating yourself with a variety of benefactions.

Knowing this should encourage you to think more about how you contribute to charity. This is what Effective Altruism and Givewell are all about. But it makes me wonder, just because we've switched over to Effective Altruism-esk charity, does that mean our motives have changed?

I don't think so. I think it's still essentially smarter and more consistent signalling.

I mean, if charity was about altruism wouldn't you be doing effective altruism in the first place? When I buy a vacuum cleaner I don't need to be talked into buying an effective one. When I go to a restaurant I don't need to be talked into going to one with good value. I seek value instinctively.

So what makes more sense is that effective altruists aren't true altruists, they're still just trying to look good. The difference between them and their unthoughtful-altruism counterparts is that the effective altruists square their selfish giving with rationality.

So I wrote a story about Gabe the Giver:

Gabe gave to charity

Thought himself a good person
Was thought of as a good person by others
When Gabe met Tye, Tye pointed out that Gabe gave to ineffective charities

Gabe thought about it

Gabe felt cognitive dissonance about it

Gabe even felt embarrassed about it

Gabe thought himself a good person, 

but a good person would have thought more about what kind of charities he gave to.

Gabe finally realized Tye was right

So Gabe started giving only to effective charities

"the highest probability of doing the most good to the neediest people"

But when Tye came back

he pointed out that Gabe still wasn't actually a good person

"Gabe my friend," Tye said, "stop playing this game"

"You've been giving quietly haven't you?"
"Yes, yes I have" answered Gabe, "because I'm not trying to show off anymore"

"But not showing off is the less effective"
"By showing off, your charity may multiply"
"Seeming pompous and preachy to your friends is true sacrifice"

Gabe realized again that Tye was right

And Gabe became an outspoken effective altruist

Tye returned and shook his head

"You still don't get it, do you?"
"You've been giving just enough for people to notice, haven't you"

Gabe confessed, "about 1% of my income"

"what a conspicuous amount"
"Just enough that it doesn't hurt more than it has to to look like like a sacrifice"

".5% doesn't look like giving at all"
"But 5% is a real challenge financially"
"You've shown me again how you yearn to seem good"
"But not be good"
A frustrated Gabe took some time to think

Before he finally decided to donate everything he could

to live on subsistence and give every extra penny

to the most effective charity

And annoyed all his friends by talking about it all the time

Why Tye returned to an impoverished Gabe he shook his head once again

"You showed me your true nature when we met"
"only then you put on the mask of an effective altruist"
"You showed me your true nature in your silence about effective altruism"
"only then you put on a mask of an outspoken one"

"You showed me your true nature when you gave just enough to get noticed"

"Only then did you put on the mask of a generous giver

"You want to look good, Gabe"
"but you're just not a good person"

Gabe nearly choked on his tears

"But what about you, Tye?"

Tye was taken aback
"You say all these things, tearing down layers of signals"

"But at the bottom is exhaustion"
"Do you realize?"

"This illusion of virtue promotes giving"

"And the greater the illusion the more effective, the more contagious, the more generous the giving"

"But strip the illusion away, take it one layer too far,
and all that's left is selfish giving, which nobody wants"

"So they don't"

"and even though deep down it's selfish giving, the recipients don't care"
"When you're starving for food, thirsting for drink, you're not concerned with the heart of the one your meal came from"

"Now I feel defeated Tye"
"You've won, congratulations"
"I'm not good and I don't want to give anymore"

I'm going to go eat my fill at Denny's now

Tye nodded his head, "Gabe, now that my job's done I will reveal to you

"I am the Spirit of Truth"

"My job is to uncover the secrets that cover human eyes"
My job is to etch reality into the human brain
"My job is to help you believe what is true, not do what is good"
"That's the spirit of Benevolence's job"
"She told me not to come here"

Then Tye, the Spirit of Truth, vanished into his cloak

"Well that guy was a real jerk," Gabe said to himself

"See? I told you" spoke a delicate voice as Gabe's hat transformed into a shining angelic spirit

"But we needed him," The spirit said, "to do good work"

"Well, I'm sure you have places to be, Gwen the Spirit of Benevolence," said Gabe

"I do" Gwen replied before she transformed into a dove and flew away

Gabe's adventure was over

He walked past the Denny's back into his cot beside the dumpster